Word Crimes

[Marc]

Time for revised lyrics (apart from the fun with words, there were still two errors - lesser/less or and emission/omission and some minor bits)

Everybody shut up! (Wooh)
Everybody listen up
Hey, hey, hey!
Hey, hey, hey!
Hey, hey, hey! (Wooh)
[.?.]

If you can't write, in the proper way (lousy writer)
If you don't know, how to conjugate (Hey)
Maybe you flunked that class (Hey, hey, hey!)
And maybe now you find (Hey, hey, hey!)
That peepl mock u onliiiiiine (Hey, hey, hey!)
(Everybody wise up)

Okay, now here's the deal: I'll try to educate ya
Gonna familiarize you with the nomenclature (meeow)
You'll learn the definitions (hey hey hey)
of nouns & prepositions (Hey, hey, hey!)
Literacy's your mission (Hey, hey, hey!)
And that's why I think it's a good time
2 lern some grammer (wut?!)
Now, did I stammer?
Work on that grammar
You should know when
It's less or it's fewer
Like people who were
never raised in a sewer (Alright)

I hate these Word Crimes
Like "I could care less." (Hey, hey, hey!)
That means you DO care (Oh ho, oh ho)
At least a little
Dont Be A Moran!
You'd better slow down
And use the right pronoun
Show the world you're no clown (Everybody wise up)

Say you've got an i t
followed by apostrophe s
Now, what does that mean?
You would not use it's in this case
as a possessive (No, no, no! :(
It's a contraction (Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!)
What's a contraction?
[Well, it's the shortening of a word or group of words by omission of a sound or letter.]

Okay, now here are some notes, syntax you're always mangling
No X in "Espresso", your participle's danglin' - Uh huh!
But I don't want your drama (Hey, hey, hey!) Uh huh!
If you really wanna (Hey, hey, hey!) Uh huh!
Leave out that Oxford comma (Hey, hey, hey!) uh huh

Just keep in mind that "be", "see", "are", "you"
are words, not letters
Get it together
Use your spell checker
You should never
wr1t3 w0rd5 u51n6 numb3rs
Unless you're 7
or your name is Prince (Everybody wise up)

I hate these Word Crimes (Hate them crimes)
You really need a (I hate them crimes)
full-time proofreader (I mean those crimes)
You dumb mouth-breather.
Well you should hire
Some cunning linguist
To help you distinguish
what is proper English (Everybody wise up)

One thing I ask of you ...
Time to learn your homophones is past due
Learn to diagram a sentence too
Always say "to whom;"
don't ever say "to who."
And listen up when I tell you this
I hope you never use "quotation marks" for "emphasis"
You finished 2nd grade; (we hoo)
I hope you could tell ...
If you're doing good or doing well (Everybody wise up)

You better figure out the difference
Irony is not coincidence
And I thought that you'd gotten it through your skull ...
about what's figurative and what's literal
Oh well ... just now (Just now...)
You said (You said...)
You "literally couldn't get out of bed." (What!?)
That really makes me want to literally smack a crowbar upside your stupid head!

I read your e-mail
It's quite apparent
Your grammar's errant
You're incoherent
Saw your blog post (Hey, hey)
It's really fantastic!
(that was sarcastic) (Oh, psych!)
Cause you write like a spastic

I hate these Word Crimes (Everybody wise up!)
Your prose is dopey (Hey!)
Think you should only (Oooo, hoooo)
Write in emoji
Oh you're a lost cause (Hey, hey, hey!)
Go back to preschool
Get out of the gene pool (Hey, hey, hey!)
Try your best to not drool

Never mind, I give up.
Really now, I give up.
(Hey, hey, hey!)
(Hey, hey, hey!)
(Go Away!)

[spmahn]

Great video, much better than yesterdays I felt. My favorite visual joke was the reference to this:

[weird_el]

You can always count on the Tea Party for the most egregious word crimes.

[Muppetboy09]

I see this going viral, just because of all the Grammar Nazis out there

[Marc]

Now what that Windows 98 or 98 SE @ 2:55?

[spmahn]

You can always count on the Tea Party for the most egregious word crimes.

Now now, no need to veer off into political opinions

[weird_el]

I know that corner! It's in my neighborhood. I guess you found the one word crime in the 2011 WI recall protest.

[symphy]

Oops, inadvertently shortchanged the animator of the video when I opined that it must have taken 200 hours to make. Heard from him via email and it turns out the actual animation took 500 hours, not 200. That makes more sense, given the incredible level of complexity. Labor of love, I'm sure, but I also hope he was well compensated by Al and RCA, given that its got "viral video" written all over it. Go art!

[Just a Bill]

Time for revised lyrics

Thanks for doing this! (Though you may want to correct your spelling on "incoherent.")

[mellow weasel]

"Moran" picture really confused me, as I haven't seen the original picture. I googled "moran moron" to find out the right spelling . Luckily that lead me to that picture.